Jason and I have begun the process of blending our lives - everything from bath towels to kitchen appliances to the contents of our freezers. We're culling, organizing, piling, sorting, and tossing our separate lives - categorizing everything with names like Donate, Trash, Keep, Store Until Spring, For Cabin, Sell, Trash When Jason's Not Looking...
The children have, at some point, fallen under each category.
I'd like to be able to report that the transition has gone smoothly, and that we are blissfully united in every way, but this blog is about real life, and that's just not true. If it were, we'd be some kind of mutant step family because it doesn't work that way. This is a messy deal. That's not to say it isn't good, but it is messy. And it's very, very hard.
Moving is stressful all by itself. Parenting is nothing if not an exercise in patience and endurance. Relationships require constant care and attention. Pregnancy...oh, glorious, mood-swinging pregnancy! Shall we count how many times I've cried in the past 3 weeks? No, let's not. But suffice to say, it's easily more than I've cried in 3 years. Now throw all of those ingredients into a big pot of boiling water. Season the concoction with stubborn pride, some old demons, and a dash of short-temper, and you've got Our Life. Sounds like the Brady Bunch, doesn't it? What a crock that show was.
Thank God we love each other. And we do. This just would not have worked with anyone else. For all our differences, and there are more than I realized, Jason is that one person I want by my side more than any other.
In between the stress, and the arguments, and the to-do's, and the challenges, there are moments of pure happiness. The kind of happiness that fills you up and doesn't leave room for anything else. It's God's way of letting us know that everything is going to be okay. I am stunned into silence sometimes by a kind gesture from one of the boys, or a look from Jason, or some tiny random thing that actually went right, and I know that we can do it. We can, and we will, make this work. We'll iron out the bumps, and we'll find our stride, and we'll work out compromises. And in the process, we'll build a family.
If we don't kill eachother first.
I believe in you! Excellent advice for us all.
ReplyDeleteYou crack me up, Erin Jones! What a brilliant woman you are with this exasperated but humorous account of a truly complicated but exciting upheaval.
ReplyDeleteAnd you just cry whenever it suits you, okay? You're growing a person. You're entitled. But it sounds like she is lucky all tucked away safely in the "Store Until Spring" department. :)
Have fun with it!